My Summer 2017 - CPE and NYC

HA!...of course I forgot to share this so......my last few days in NYC were FANTABULOUS, especially my last day. I'm back in Sewanee now, have taken a personal retreat in two parts, and classes have begun - TODAY! More info on classes I'm taking at the very bottom of this post. 
Howdy y'all! :-)
Having only three days left here in NYC, I decided to put some of my thoughts of CPE and living in NYC mixed into a generic update on my summer. I've been way from home since the end of the spring semester in April and it's been pretty nonstop busy, but I do love that.

Back in the spring, I received two grants (Seminary Consultation on Mission and Episcopal Church Global Missions) to travel to the Philippines. With faculty support, I scheduled my exams early to make the trip. I'm in the process of writing about my journey and the work I did there so stay tuned to this blog (you can sign up via email on the right-hand side of the screen). I spent three weeks there and was able to visit and work with small remote villages, attend the national synod and write an ENS article about it, and learn about The Episcopal Church in The Philippines. It was FANTASTIC and I do hope to return!

Two weeks before I left though, my mother had a stroke in Charleston, SC. She was in and out of the ER for four days and it was an extremely stressful time. My brother and I worked hard to make sure she was receiving the care she needed for stroke recovery and other issues. After a month of waiting on certain documents, we finally received necessary paperwork and my brother was able to get things rolling with placing her in an assisted living facility. During my CPE (explained below) unit, I flew down from New York to clear out some of the house and move Mom’s things into storage while my brother dealt with other things on Mom’s behalf. In July, he was able to help her get to a facility in NC. She is doing extremely well in her new place and seems happy. I am also happy and grateful that she is receiving the care that she needs, has friends, and is enjoying activities there!!
In light of my Mom's health, I did discern much about whether or not I should go to the Philippines, but I had some help and advice and in the end, I decided to go. After returning, I immediately began my CPE (Clinical Pastoral Education) program in New York on May 22. All Episcopal seminarians must complete a unit of CPE and it’s usually done the summer after the first year in the MDiv program. My CPE placement has been in New York at NYU Langone-Brooklyn Medical Center and I have been living in a room in East Williamsburg in Brooklyn. NYUL is a Level I trauma center and is widely known and respected for its stroke response and medical teams. Working here, I've been able to be part of rapid response teams and witness the efficient, caring, and holistic care the hospital provides. I've gotten to know patients and their families, some staff, and some docs. I've listened, prayed with and for, distributed communion, sat in silence, cried with, laughed with, been at bedsides where last breaths were taken, been at cribs where new babies cooed, and been there as fiances screamed at the sudden loss of their beloved. My CPE program consisted of 300 hours of volunteer chaplaincy work and 100 hours of class – not to mention the books, presentations, and papers! I was placed in the stroke/neurological wing and that was very interesting, but tough. The summer has been challenging, emotional, intense, filled with holy moments, and I have learned so so sooooo much. Many say that CPE is transformative and indeed it has been. Knowing that most of us had similar experiences is also an amazing part of the communal nature of the journey to priesthood in The Episcopal Church (and other denominations). I'm grateful that we can share threads of these deep experiences, similar challenges, and mutual growth in self-awareness and pastoral identity with each other and with our future congregations.

I finished both the class and volunteer hours as of August 1st, but stayed a little on as an NYUL chaplain for a bit. I love the work and I love living up here so I was excited to stay on! 

Some of the things I have loved while working at NYUL:
- Meeting patients from around the world and being a chaplain to them
- Feeling more affirmed in my pastoral identity
- Learning tools for interacting with people when they are in distress and/or grieving
- Establishing personal learning goals for working with people in ministry
- Learning more about interreligious chaplaincy as it pertains to healing
- Developing better self-awareness on many, MANY levels

- Being ok with silence in togetherness with patients
- Being part of the RRT - (rapid response team) and what helps make NYUL known for a center that provides holistic healing
- Learning from my CPE colleagues, my supervisors, patients, and hospital staff
- Being on-call in evening shifts...I found that I liked this very much.

Some of the things I have loved about living in New York are:
- Not having a car

- Iced coffee. I always disliked iced coffee until, quite suddenly, this summer, I began to love it and have become rather used to having it often!
- Student tickets to museums and some Broadway shows
- Cafes and shops on almost every corner
- Attending St. Mary the Virgin Church. It became apparent that many people didn't understand why I attended the same church each Sunday. I've been coming to NYC fairly often since 1989 so have attended many of the ones they recommended and after a whole year of attending a different church almost every Sunday, I REALLY felt like attending the same church all summer long and it was worth it. Lovely church, excellent rector (Stephen Gerth) and music (David Hurd, director). "Smokey Mary's" www.stmvirgin.org
- Many parks and quiet spots can be found...one simply has to look
- Seeing friends I know from New Orleans and New York
- The pizza (of course!)
- Having work here and feeling like I'm part of things and have a non-touristy purpose
- The diversity and hearing different languages all around me
- The many flowers I've found on my walks
- People don't look down upon you for using social media here
- People DO NOT care what you look like
- Free lunches for volunteers at the hospital. These have enabled me to save money all summer long and see shows and go to museums!
- There are beaches here...I had forgotten that!

Some things I don't like:
- It's ridiculously expensive
- Summer is HOT and I say that having lived in NOLA, Columbia, SC, and Atlanta, GA

It's MISERABLE though, b/c it seems as if few places have adequate air conditioning. While most subway trains are cool inside, the standing platforms where you wait are like OVENS. I am not exaggerating one bit
- Crazy people on the subway who ruin perfectly good rides
- Those times when well-meaning people have lists of things they think you should do in NYC, but you either can't or have differing tastes and motives
- Climbing all the steps....there are so many....tooooooo many

- Daily motion sickness riding the trains. Mine has always been pretty bad. I can handle most short train rides, though I sometimes feel a bit nauseous and exit with a really bad headache. I was glad for the 10-12 minute walk from the subway station to the hospital so that I could feel better each day before starting work
                     
I am very grateful to my host, an experienced staff NYUL chaplain. She let me afford living in her place this summer AND she let me bring my dear sweet Bluebell kitty up with me! She has two sweet kitties and everyone gets along :-)

When I return to Sewanee, I will do some much-needed apartment cleaning, finish getting books for the semester, have a couple of meetings, hopefully view the solar eclipse (it had better not be cloudy!), and more. One thing I am especially grateful for is that I have planned a personal retreat during the week before classes begin. YIPPEE! I’ll get to have an actual peaceful much-needed break, thanks to some very caring friends. 
We have a Quiet Day on Monday, August 28 and classes begin on Tuesday, August 29.
I'm taking the following classes:
- Pastoral Theology I
- Systematic Theology I
- A course on C.S. Lewis
- A ministry course called Transforming Congregations
- Foundations in Preaching and the preaching lab that goes with it
- I am attempting to take Arabic lessons this year, but not for credit
I'm very excited and have happy butterflies about returning and this second year!
                     
               

Summer 2017 update for St. Paul's

Dear St. Paul’s Family,

It’s time for an update from your Sewanee seminarian! First, I’d like to thank you for keeping me in your prayers and for your support of all that I am doing and learning. Much has gone on since I last saw you in December and wrote to you in the spring. First, I received two grants (Seminary Consultation on Mission and Episcopal Church Global Missions) to travel to the Philippines. With faculty support, I scheduled my exams early to make the trip. I am in the process of writing about my journey and the work I did there so stay tuned to this blog (you can sign up via email on the right-hand side of the screen). I spent three weeks there and was able to visit and work with small remote villages, attend the national synod and write an ENS article about it, and learn about The Episcopal Church in The Philippines. 

Two weeks before I left though, my mother had a stroke in Charleston, SC. She was in and out of the ER for four days and it was an extremely stressful time. My brother and I worked hard to make sure she was receiving the care she needed for progressive dementia and stroke recovery. After a month of waiting on certain documents, we finally received paperwork that was necessary to establish power of attorney and were able to get things rolling with placing her in an assisted living facility. I flew down from New York to clean out the house and move Mom’s things into storage while my brother dealt with selling the house on Mom’s behalf. In July, he was able to do that and Mom is now in a facility in Durham, NC, near my brother. She is doing extremely well in her new place and seems happy. I am happy and grateful that she is receiving the care that she needs!!!!
I discerned much about whether or not I should go to the Philippines, but I had some help and advice and in the end, I decided to go. After I returned, I immediately began my CPE (Clinical Pastoral Education) program in New York on May 22. All seminarians must complete a unit of CPE and it’s usually done the summer after the first year in the MDiv program. My CPE placement has been in New York at NYU Langone-Brooklyn Medical Center and I have been living in a room in East Williamsburg in Brooklyn. NYUL is a Level I trauma center and is widely known and respected for its stroke response and medical teams. Working here, I have been able to be part of rapid response and witness the efficient, caring, and holistic care the hospital provides. My CPE program consisted of 300 hours of volunteer chaplaincy work and 100 hours of class – not to mention the books, presentations, and papers! I was placed in the stroke/neurological wing and that was very interesting, but tough. The summer has been challenging, emotional, intense, filled with holy moments, and I have learned so so sooooo much. Many say that CPE is transformative and indeed it has been.

I finished both the class and volunteer hours this past week and was asked to stay on as an NYUL chaplain until I leave New York in ten days. I love the work and I love living up here so I was excited to stay on! Our CPE unit graduation is this coming Tuesday, May 8th - please keep all chaplain residents and interns in your prayers.

Some of the things I have loved while working at NYUL are:

- Meeting patients from around the world and being a chaplain to them

- Feeling more affirmed in my pastoral identity

- Learning tools for interacting with people when they are in distress and/or grieving

- Establishing personal learning goals for working with people in ministry

- Learning more about interreligious chaplaincy as it pertains to healing

- Developing better self-awareness on many, MANY levels

- Being part of the RRT - the rapid response team and what helps make NYUL known for a center that provides holistic healing

- Learning from my CPE colleagues, my supervisors, patients, and hospital staff

- Being on-call...I found that I liked this very much. 

- Iced coffee. I always disliked iced coffee until, quite suddenly, this summer, I began to love it and have become rather used to having it often!

 
Some of the things I have loved about living in New York are:

- Not having a car

- Student tickets to museums and some Broadway shows

- Cafes and shops on every corner

- Many parks and quiet spots can be found,one simply has to look

- Seeing friends I know from New Orleans and New York

- The pizza (of course!)

- Having work here and feeling like I'm part of things

- The diversity and hearing different languages all around me

- The many flowers I've found on my walks

- People don't look down upon you for using social media here

- People DO NOT care what you look like

- Free lunches for volunteers at the hospital. These have enabled me to save money all summer long and see shows and go to museums!

- There are beaches here!

Some things I don't like:

- It's ridiculously expensive.

- Summer is HOT and I say that having lived in NOLA, Columbia, SC, and Atlanta, GA. It's MISERABLE though, b/c few places have adequate air conditioning and while most subway trains are cool inside, the standing platforms where you wait are like OVENS. I am not exaggerating one bit.

- Crazy people on the subway who ruin perfectly good rides.

- Those times when well-meaning people have lists of things they think you should do in NYC, but you either can't or have differing tastes and motives.

- Climbing all the steps....there are so many....tooooooo many.

                       

I am very grateful to my host, an experienced staff NYUL chaplain. She let me afford living in her place this summer AND she let me bring my dear sweet Bluebell kitty up with me! She has two sweet kitties and everyone gets along :-)

 

When I return to Sewanee, I will do some much-needed apartment cleaning, finish getting books for the semester, have a couple of meetings, hopefully view the solar eclipse, and more. One thing I am especially grateful for is that friends of mine will let me use their mountain cabin for a few days during the week before classes begin so I’ll get to have an actual peaceful much-needed retreat break. We have a Quiet Day on Monday, August 28 and classes begin on Tuesday, August 29. 

I'm taking the following classes:

- Pastoral Theology I

- Systematic Theology I

- A course on C.S. Lewis

- A ministry course called Transforming Congregations

- Foundations in Preaching and the preaching lab that goes with it

I'm very excited and have happy butterflies about returning and this second year!

I will be visiting New Orleans and St. Paul’s over Labor Day weekend and attending that Sunday’s 10:15 AM service so I hope to see you all in person!

                        

                 

A Moment

I needed a moment today. A big one. So, I'm eating out for the third time since May 22. 

I spent HOURS trying to finish scheduling things and making phone calls. Yesterday, I just finished my last CPE class session so I was supposed to take today OFF and tomorrow as well. Instead, I worked on things all day....things that will make life much easier when I get back to Sewanee for a bit before classes begin. I did it though - and remotely got a great start to being back at home. So, I'm rather excited to say that not only did I finish my final CPE course yesterday, but I finished my hours on Tuesday. I decided a while back that I'd stay in NYC a week longer than graduation (August 8) for a couple of reasons. First, I want to see friends I haven't gotten a chance to see up here since I've been so busy! Secondly, I was not sure at the time whether or not I'd be finished with my hours and it was recommended to me that I get a one-way ticket and wait to decide upon the return date. 

 

                   My dinner of chicken pad Thai at Sage in Brooklyn                       

Once back at Sewanee, I'll have a couple of days to bomb the apartment to get rid of spiders etc., get the new tires I needed last October and see if my car even still runs, and join a one-day Orientation trip to Memphis with the incoming class of seminarians. I hope to then experience the solar eclipse and...AND....AAAAANNNNND.... I need a retreat. 

I really REALLY need it. It's been nonstop since spring break and much of the time super intense. SO, I planned one. I did it. I picked a tiny little town in an undisclosed location....somewhere not too far away, yet AWAY, and a place that has peace, activities, views, water, etc. I PLANNED IT! I'm so excited! It's just two days, BUT who cares, right?! I cannot wait!! YIPPEEEEEE!!!

A Little CPE Reflection

I'll preface this by saying that it's a boiling hot summer day in NYC and I've a free day, but feel rather congested so I decided to stay home and write and watch a few movies later. I hope this makes some sense and either is of interest of helps those seeking CPE experiences. :-)

At the core of my personal theology resides two themes: that of our time being short upon this Earth and that of all humanity belonging to God and being comprised of a colorful collage of brokenness within it. I believe that our souls, our essences of spirit, are forms of sentient energy, separate, yet inextricably bound to our bodies….these bodies…these growing and learning, yet breakable and decaying bodies. We were created in the image of God, we are broken by our journey, and we will be healed in and by Christ’s breaking and rising. There is a temporal limit to our bodies and no one knows whether our souls existed before or will last afterwards. I choose to believe they live onward. I also believe that we are all children of God of equal standing in life and death. We are all born and we all die. There is no distinction and no division within Christ. Romans 3:22-25, “For there is no distinction, since all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God; they are now justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus, whom God put forward as a sacrifice of atonement by his blood, effective through faith.” 

One aspect of what this means to me is that I am as broken as my fellow man. As a postulant, praying and studying to one day (God willing) become a priest, I am called to use my brokenness to minister to those paralyzed by the fear this brokenness may create. This summer unit of Clinical Pastoral Education (CPE), has placed me in an extremely socio-economically and demographically diverse environment. I chose it. It was as close as I could get to doing my CPE in another country. I crave diversity of people and culture.

There are no seminary bubbles here. 
There are no remote and lush mountain hideaways here. 
Here, one is faced with everything and everyone and can embrace the truths of the raw and beautiful or of the hidden and ugly…basically all aspects of humanity. It continues to be very refreshing for my soul and I feel at home in the middle of it all. It is not easy though. I was placed in a stroke/neurological unit after my mother had a stroke. It has hit home HARD that our family has these tendencies toward strokes and dementia. There have been times I’ve relived my father’s death through witnessing someone else’s love done gasping for that last breath. I have seen dysfunctional family dynamics and it has been like a mirror to my own family. These were not events that I buried, not at all, but rather, events that, like grief, tend to resurface.

In a hospital environment, the brokenness of the body comes with the aching of the soul, the purest joy at rehabilitative progress, the deep sadness of parting, the humor from tired, slap-happy minds, the pain of needles, the happy tears of new and health birth, the stench of bodies, the warmth of blankets, the noise…and the silence. My calling to be a priest in this world has called me to pray, discern, and reflect. I am recognizing both strengths and growing edges of mine. Some of my gifts are  enthusiasm, listening, reflection, and energy. Some of my strengths have nothing to do with my gifts, but rather the progress I have made in some of my growing edges. Even the tiniest bit of self-awareness is something I consider as progress. The urge to fix, the uncertainty of pastoral identity, and the awareness of how my anxiety plays roles in various situations from the unknown, to the wanting-to-be-in-charge, to the yes/no questions preventing going deeper with patients – these have all been identified and are all being worked on. I am feeling more at home in my role as it is sculpted toward priesthood. I feel more comfortable with the constancy of human physical ailments, traumatic events, the dying process, and thinking and talking about death.

This feeling of home aligns with one of the themes we studied and read about in our CPE course books this summer, that of grief and the grieving process. [The books are: I Thought It Was Just Me (But It Wasn’t) by Brené Brown and All Our Losses, All Our Griefs by Mitchell and Anderson]. CPE has helped me to gain some tools to help me recognize when and how others are grieving. Grief does not simply take the form of physical death, but can also go along with change itself. I will grieve the loss of some of the ways I’ve done things and habits I’ve held. For example: in letting go of trying to fix things when I listen to suffering, I can become a vessel of God’s healing presence, allowing for an authenticity from the patient I’m with, an honesty and sincerity of feeling and emotion that they can express. I have re-learned in CPE that one of the most comforting things I can offer to someone is silence. Any words of comfort must be those that can let them open up their own experiences and find sacred space in which they can find their own path to God’s healing. Even if the person is not of any faith background, spiritual and sacred experiences can happen.

People need the holy. They need to know God cares for them, even in their grief and that God is there for them, even in their raw state of being. Having let down my fences through therapy in the past, I know how healing it can be to let go. Still, letting go, involves a type of grief over the loss of what you let go. What if you never had it to begin with? Can a person grieve over something they have never had? I propose that yes, we can in fact grieve the loss of something we have not actually had. It can be the loss of an imagined state, the loss of potential, or the loss of an opportunity for growth. During this summer of CPE and working with patients at the hospital, I have observed many people who have suddenly lost physical opportunities they did not consider until it became too late. They grieve in varying ways. CPE is teaching me to learn to sit with them in this grief instead of creating a false sort of bravery that keeps sorrow and death at a comfortable distance. By showing our vulnerability do we begin to reach the sacredness inside ourselves. By allowing others to do so without invasion, we allow them to experience release and healing. This allowance is a thin place in our emotional lives, enabling us to be truly connected with God and open to God’s interaction with all humanity. Once we are comfortable with our own vulnerability and our own sense of the holiness in ourselves, we can truly be home anywhere. By this, I mean that we may give ourselves, our souls, and our bodies to the God in everyone and every place we experience.

Some of the cultural and sociological observations I have include the following. I’ve seen no racial, age, or cultural issues arise, but I have seen gender issues while at NYUL. NYUL is a hospital open to all, but most of the patients are Catholic and many in this tradition prefer to have a male Catholic priest. Likewise, I have seen men in the Jewish faith or Muslim traditions prefer not to pastorally talk with a woman. It has been very interesting for me to see these dynamics. Because of my travels and personality, I can often provide pastoral support for these families even if they did not necessarily want to “see a chaplain”. Part of being a good leader is to know when to step back and when to follow and to do it willingly, both for the sake of respect and for learning. I was respected as an intern and included by response teams doctors, family, and others. I was invited to discussions, allowed to watch some therapy and some procedures, and grew comfortable and affirmed in my role.

Theologically, I saw God at this hospital….in patients, pastoral care team, staff, doctors, and more. I have been in hospitals many times, but this time being in a leadership capacity, I was able to step into others’ grieving process and witness transformation in progress. I did not see the end results of many of these processes, but having a glimpse into them was valuable. Chaplains are in a unique role of representing God and/or the Divine. Sometimes all we can do is to let a person know that the divine is still divine in the midst of their story. The sacred nature of this is the visceral reality of our own mortality. Again, we are all born and we all die. Where do we stand before God? How shall we live out our lives? The key for me is made of favorite quotes from Jonathan Swift and Henri Amiel.

May you live all the days of your life.
~ Jonathan Swift (1667-1745)

My friends, Life is short, and we do not have much time to gladden the hearts of those who travel with us, so be quick to love and make haste to be kind. And may the blessing of the One who made us, and the One who loves us, and the One who travels with us, be with you and those you love this day and always. AMEN.
~ Adapted from Henri-Frédéric Amiel (1821–1881)

Below is one of my spiritual reflections after an evening shift at NYUL.

As soon as I walked out of the hospital, I could feel it and so I chose to walk slowly, savoring every moment. My whole 0.7 mile walk to the subway station this evening was a mystical and transcendent thin place. It's chilly, misting droplets filling the air, and the twilight fading into the night. The softness of the air. The hum of a streetlight. The hint of the idea of an Autumn out of place. The sounds of children playing. The smells of dinners. The oddity of civic fireflies that flickered over green garbage cans and brownstones. A multitude of languages, cars whooshing by, bells on shop doors dinging the way in or the way out, music of all sorts coming from a distance down every street, the smell of fresh laundry, and an occasional breeze in the trees. I'm so grateful to have moments like this! Moments of satisfying joy, a twinge of sadness, a breath of excitement - Moments that fill me with inexplicable longing, yet fill me with this transitory life itself. I walked from the past, through the present, and touched the future tonight. 
Thanks be to God.

Sometimes, we suit up for the protection of the patient or our protection.

Hair-Raising Rantings of a Ginger

Keep in the recesses of your mind while you read this - that this is in fact, my hair, my head, and my opinion!

There are unalienable truthbombs all redheaded folks face, though I wonder if it's as much of an issue in northern Scotland as it is in my neck of the woods. People you've never met will ask about the nature of your hair: whether it's real or not, whether or not certain other portions match the hair on your head, whether you steal souls when you get angry, or whether you've ever been called "Annie" before (oh THAT's a new one #not).
Seriously, people have no shame about it and feel you shouldn't either. Regardless of your heritage, it will always be assumed you're Irish (not that that's a bad thing)! How dare you think of cutting it. "You should" blah blah blah.. Srsly. People will give you unwanted advice ALL. THE. TIME.
People tell me several times a week how jealous they are and compare my hair to someone they've known or known about. I get stopped on the street, even here in NYC just last week. They offer recommendations about what colors to wear in makeup, clothing, and look offended if you don't like "terracotta camel orangine" or whatever...but you get the point. 
I might appreciate compliments....if they weren't only ever followed by advice and directives.
It gets old. 
 
It's fun to see their faces when I tell them how I used to want to dye my hair black when I was in kindergarten through six grade. 

It's way less fun to hear their shocked and critical responses. 

They tell me "that's crazy", "you're insane", "how stupid can you be?!" "only an idiot would do that....you should (blah blah blah)" and proceed to tell me how lucky I am to have this color and that people would kill for it (really?) That only made me want to change it more.
For as long as I can remember in my life, I've been having to interact with this strange sort of attention. My brother and I used to think we were adopted because we didn't know as tiny children that red hair is a recessive gene and sometimes skips a generation. I used to be teased and bullied by kids my own age AND ADULTS who acted as if it was so hilarious to call me Annie all the time or some other name. It wasn't just the names. As I grew up, I traveled to other countries where redheads were thought to be from the dark side, or witches, or worse. Watch out, or I might steal your soul. Good grief, England is TERRIBLE when it comes to gingers. Then again, Italy is not. I was reminded how they'e often angelic and in Titian paintings or Florentine Renaissance Botticelli works. 
Nowadays, anyone can be a redhead and that's great....or is it?
I read. I traveled some more. I grew up and embraced what I wanted and dropped the rest. I actually began to legitimately love my hair and in fact, I truly do appreciate it as an identifier. It's also quite pretty in the sunlight. Not many people have red hair. There is much distinction between shades too. Here are a few quick facts about us gingers:
- Usually redheads are born with brown eyes, but many end up being green (mine change from green to grey to green/blue etc.)
- Redheads have less hair than most other colors, but each individual strand is stronger
- Red hair doesn't usually turn grey, it sometimes goes through a molting bird color and then turns white.
- Redheads are more sensitive to hot and cold
- Gingers often need more anesthesia
- Redheads have low concentrations of eumelanin in their body and as a result, they can’t absorb the required level of Vitamin D. However, they make up for this by producing their own Vitamin D when they are exposed to low-light conditions.

- (Personal note: bees stung me more and horses tried to eat my hair...I assume they thought I was a GIANT CARROT!)

I will fry up if they even think about the sun, but that won't change if my hair color changes. Red air is who I am now. It's toughened me, made me stronger, and become something that connects me to legends and beauty and truly unique creatures of nature...plus the whole "I was considered a vampire in ancient Greece" thing gets me a few cool points. I'm not getting rid of it, but I've finally decided to scratch the itch of dying it a bit. I can no longer ignore my fascination with blues and purples and shiny tints of peach. I'm not 100% sure what I'll do and I'm sure it'll last only a few weeks and then I'll return to my normal color. If anything, cutting my hair is also an option. My body type doesn't do too well with long flowy locks, but I've had them for the past 12 years anyway :-) Why? Because it's MY head and MY hair....plus I had a terrible bowl cut for most of my life before the long locks. I also lost 2/3 of my hair after VSG surgery. I almost cut it all off except that it seemed to grow back with a bit of natural curl in it (wahoo!) As someone who spent HOURS daily in hard plastic heated rollers and then used a curling iron and hairspray, that is a miracle!

So, I've bought some colorful dye and who knows what'll happen next! To anyone who is ultra concerned with my hair or think my intelligence level has been compromised, I strongly urge you to pick a new obsession ;-)

Mungeli, India 2015

A Visit to Mungeli, India - Mission trip - Summer 2015
I've returned to the Christian Hospital Mungeli  and the Rambo Memorial School
This year, the internet was less consistent than last year so I emailed myself these blog posts and am just now getting around to posting them! 

It's Sunday in Mungeli and I'm back in my room after a trip to the local church down the road followed by a walk into the town. It is SO HOT! I needed a cool down break under some fans and with some water. I arrived in India last Thursday (MSY--AMS--DEL) and spent the night in the boiling hot & stuffy Delhi airport on a reasonably comfy bench until my early AM flight to Raipur. I was so sleepy that I got off the plane in Nagpur and thank goodness they checked my boarding pass and told me I needed to get back on board! Arriving in Raipur, I waited for my friend Kahala and the driver to come and pick me up for the ride to Mungeli. When they came, it was decided to stop at a grocery for some necessities some of the other visitors to the Christian Hospital needed and so picked up some lunch to go while we were there. The drive to Mungeli was full of a million annoying stops and so bumpy I'm surprised all my internal organs made it intact! The driving is actually pretty scary here. One must drive at top speed, dodging cows, dogs, people, motorbikes, cars, and huge trucks. Often, when passing another vehicle, it's an outright game of chicken, seeing who will give in to getting back in his lane. The other consideration in all this is the road quality. New Orleans, I hate to tell you this, but the state of Chhattisgarh has you beat, by a factor of about a million. The craters in the road are sometimes as big as your car and dangerously deep. You can usually dodge them, but if you accidentally go through the wrong one, you may destroy your car or truck. If people slowed down slightly, it would help, but I learned last year that everyone here is used to it all. I gave up worrying about it and just tried to trust that we'd make it. I figured the driver didn't want to die today so would be at least a baseline level of careful. Seatbelts might help. Maybe.

My first day here, I had to rest immediately and I later went to dinner to meet two girls from Denmark and four Americans (from Butler and Eureka colleges). They are a terrific group and we shared dinner in the guest house.
The next day, Friday, I had NO jetlag because I had beena wake for so long and slept like the aforementioned boulder! I attended the chapel at 7:30 AM and I was so surprised to receive such a fantastic welcome! The nursing students were all there and many remembered me from last year's visit!!! They are SO SWEET!!!!! At the end of chapel, I was introduced and one of the girls gave me a beautiful garland of marigolds!!!

Christian Hospital Mungeli

We left chapel all together to go downstairs and see the new medical equipment that had arrived. It's high definition and to be used for their Urology work.

                                           

I was asked to bless the new medical tools so I said a prayer asking for blessing and longevity of use as well as for God to guide the hands of those who use these new tools. 

Dr. Anil Henry, the wonderful head of Christian Hospital Mungeli and a great surgeon, said a few words about the equipment and showed them to everyone. 
This was followed by DELICIOUS jelabies and spicy samosas. Jelabies are soft, honey-filled pretzely swirls of goodness. 

Samosas are little fried pockets of potato and onions and heavy spices. They give me heartburn, as most of the food here does. I also had taken my first Doxycycline pill (for Malaria prevention) and those tend to give me heartburn as well so I stayed with sampling the jelabies :-)

It was time for morning rounds in the hospital. Last year, I did this a few times and would stop back by sometimes in the afternoon to see some of the patients. The morning group consisted of Dr. Henry, one or two other doctors and nurses, and some of the visitors. I noticed there were several malaria patients this year, including one with cerebral malaria who was not doing well. Malaria is endemic to this area and is especially rampant during monsoon season. About halfway through the rounds, I actually began to feel quite ill. I thought I was going to have to throw up so I quickly left ICU and headed outside. The EXACT same thing happened to me last year on my first day. The Doxycycline gave me severe heartburn and some nausea and I did throw up. This time, I didn't throw up, but I realized I needed to eat something quickly or I would. You're supposed to take Doxy with either food or a milky substance and I had simply had a couple of crackers. I think that's why I didn't throw up though - at least it was something. So, I went to the guest house, where I stayed last year and where the Danes and American students are staying. It's also where Tripdte, the cook, makes Masala chai and meals. I ate an egg and felt immensely and immediately better!
After breakfast, I sort of made my own "rounds" and saw lots of familiar faces, visited the nursing students' classrooms, and came back after lunch for a nap, still exhausted from reflux and ok, maybe a tad bit of jetlag. I went in the early evening to work on singing with the nursing students and had great plans. The American students came too and we waited almost an hour, but no one came. We think the message didn't get through and that's my fault because while I made a small announcement, I didn't find the person in charge of their schedule. No matter, we went back to the guest house for dinner and had some fun conversations.

me in the middle w/ Issac and Grace, fellow missionaries

Saturday, I attended morning chapel and had breakfast. I visited various departments until lunchtime and then went back to my room to rest instead of eating. That Doxy is a MEAN and TERRIBLE medicine. In the afternoon, I contacted the school and then did some work for projects at home. Early evening brought a super fun time with the first-year (and four of the second-year) nursing students! We warmed up, something they've never done before! It made them think I am totally crazy, but I could tell from their giggles that some were enjoying being silly with their voices :-) Next, I talked to them about the differences between head voice and chest voice and when to use them. After I demonstrated it a few times, they did it with me. It will be a constant reminder during the next couple of weeks. I introduced two songs that the second-year students learned last year and they did them with pretty good success. Then, I talked to them a little about the functions of music in worship. We sang one of the songs I taught them and since we had reached the end of the hour, called it a night. 

My lovely nursing students!

Today, Sunday, my roommate Kahala and I went to the Mungeli church which is a Disciples of Christ congregation and attended their morning service.

Mungeli Christian Church

It was quite lively and about two and a half hours. I really enjoyed hearing so much of the Hindi language and getting to meet some of the townspeople, but I didn't understand a single word of the sermon and it was difficult to maintain concentration. There was a praise band and while it's not necessarily my preferred style of music, it was very moving to hear everyone singing together and wonderful to see people smiling. Afterwards, we walked the rest of the way into town and did some errands and looked around.

We ended up at a new store to buy laundry detergent and several people wanted to take a picture of me and with me and wanted to hand their babies to me for pictures. I did do some group photos, but handling babies was so not going to happen. I remember this happened at the Taj Mahal last year. I suppose I do look extremely different, being so pale and with a mess of red hair! it was a bit much today though so we left and came back to the hospital. This evening, we attended the hospital chapel and then went for dinner in the guest house. Tonight after dinner, all of the missionaries got together and went through our visit prayerfully and sang a few hymns. That was super nice. This particular group of missionaries is bonding very well.
Monday holds my first visit back at the Rambo Memorial School to see some social studies presentations, meet with some teachers, and to get started teaching some music classes. I think that I may be heading to Bilaspur on Tuesday afternoon  after school to see some temples and then eat at a roadside restaurant on the way back!

The Peace of Being

(from my travels in Tennessee and time at St. Mary's, Sewanee, June 2015)

My afternoon was the magic of sitting in clover and grass, breathing fresh air. My evening was watching the silent flicker of fireflies from a rocking chair. My night is the cool, soft breeze under a starry sky. Thank you God, for everything!